This is beautiful. Watch the video here: Cinderella. Get some tissue first.
April 23, 2008
I have been packing since Christmas. Yeah, I’m that good. It takes me six months to pack up a three bedroom apartment. I have put off so many things I’ve lost count. Perhaps some part of me thinks that if I don’t put my ducks in a row, they won’t walk away. And I can stay put.
We’ve moved alot. We’ve lived most of the last 10 years in some in-between kind of mode. Always ready to move on to the next phase or stage. THIS IS DIFFERENT. bittersweet. I like it here. I’m happy here. I’m at my best here. This place has become home to me. It’s only a year, we’re coming back. I’m not finding much comfort in that.
ok, for my family and friends in the States…if you get offended by this rambling, you just don’t understand. I am so excited to see you all again. It will be a time of wonderful reunion and fellowship (most of the time). But, while I will be experiencing you in your element, on your turf, in your groove, you will probably never experience me in mine.
The life I love is here in Manila. I so desperately want to share it with you personally. For you to see me in my place doing my thing. Is that just too wierd?
This upheaval is taking a toll on me. I feel it so deeply. We use the term “home” very loosely. In fact, we avoid it for the most part.
But tell me, am I the only one that nearly weeps when a US Immigration Officer says “Welcome home.”
March 1, 2008
It’s been too long since I’ve posted anything. My life is a long unchecked to-do list that I can’t see the end of.
The time I could use to write, I spend reading other people’s stuff. I learn so much, and am so moved that I can’t breath sometimes. This post is untitled because I couldn’t find words for my emotions after reading Lauren’s Post today. Please take the time you would have spent reading my ramblings and read this.
If you can’t live without coffee, and appreciate GOOD coffee, read this.
If there is a heart in you that breaks often because of human suffering, read this.
I know no one could detail, care for, erase, ease, or even begin to comfort all the injustice in the world, but by choosing to care, we can make a difference. Above all, for all that you are aware of… PRAY. You may have no money to spare, but give a little of your precious time to prayer.
That’s all from me. Please go here now.
December 7, 2007
This first baby of mine is growing up and I’m a mess. She’s only 8 and I’m feeling torn and crazy, and weepy, and overwhelming love and need to protect her, all of them.
I walked into a school chapel today just in time to catch her very short solo. She never told me she was going to sing all by herself. I was late and I almost missed it. My heart could not contain the emotion and the floodgates in my eyes overflowed. I ALMOST MISSED IT! The sense of near loss just surrounded me and I was dizzy.
When I hear these kids of mine singing out praise to God, I’m overcome. They all love Jesus, and I am amazed and afraid, and confident and terrified, and secure, and anxious… Who will they become? What kind of choices will they make?
Not long ago I was needing to discipline Anna. I felt so helpless to find a way to teach her, that it’s not me, not her dad that matter. How do I teach these precious daughters of mine that the most important choice they make every day is to live in a way that pleases God? Am I doing that? Do they get it?
Sometimes I don’t pay enough attention, I miss so much. So much insight into their hearts and minds. I don’t want to be the parent that show’s up too late and misses out on a really amazing kid.
The most beautiful thing I saw today was the light in Vivian and Anna’s eyes when they realized that I was there for them. It felt good, but there was also pain.
November 22, 2007
5:30 am. get up, sneeze a million times, wake anna and vivian to get ready for school. yesterday vivian turned 8. my heart is too full.
5:45 am. throw together a totally unhealthy fast breakfast, I’m too tired to cook or peel fruit.
6:09 am. hug the girls till they can’t breath and see them into the school van. they have an hour to ride to school. at this point i’m glad it’s raining. i don’t feel like walking. txt walking partner to say so. she cheekily lets me know she didn’t even get up.
6:12 am. pay a visit to Jean, my good friend and the branch accountant (always good to be friendly with accounting people). we scheme up a plan to have starbucks coffee in our hands by 7.
6:22 am. jean leaves to get the coffee, i turn on my computer. i should be making stuffing, but i forgot to buy celery. have to wait for helper to arrive with the celery. not ready to get my work out going on the pie crusts.
6:30 am. check the typhoon website, i mean, what’s up with all this rain. yep, there’s one coming. not a direct hit for us which means all the rain and no cool wind. i notice that everything, i mean everything in our apartment is heavy and damp.
7:03 am. my blog stinks, nobody commented on last post so i took it down, along with a couple others. jean txts me, she’s at the gate with my coffee. oh i love this woman.
7:08 am. back at the computer ready to do something about that blog. read leslie’s first, she’s brilliant.
7:30 am. time to talk turkey. today i will stuff (did I mention I also make my own stuffing?) and roast one 20lb turkey, bake 6 pies (that includes from scratch crust), make countless corn muffins, and dinner rolls (all from scrath, people), fellowship with some pretty amazing friends and eat way too much.
i remember being terrified at the thought of being old enough to be responsible for the turkey. i figured only really mature grown ups could cook a turkey. i’m neither mature, nor grown up, and my turkey’s goose is cooked!
October 31, 2007
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October 24, 2007
I know, it’s been too long. Most likely noone even stops by this lonely abandoned site anymore. I have been SUPER busy. Let’s see, preparing for, and singing in a wedding, managing the SIL Philippines Guest House, organizing the food service for two workshops, participating in one of the workshops, serving on our barangay homeowner’s association, Going on my 2nd Honeymoon (more about that later), etc…
Anyway, the aforementioned workshop will continue until the end of this week. It is a phase of our required cross cultural training. So far, I really am enjoying it. There’s always so much to learn, to just soak up.
Today we were discussing the role of personality in conflict, and seeing ourselves as God sees us verses how we see ourselves and how others see us. I was reminded of a reflective tool we were introduced to during a training a few years ago. It’s called the Johari Window (click to read about it).
Anyway this thing really stuck out to me today as something I should pursue. So I did a little surfing and found an interactive Johari Window online. Please go HERE and click to highlight 5-6 words you feel best describe me. Oh, and be honest.
I’m really interested to see how it turns out. Maybe you’ll want to do one for yourself.
August 28, 2007
I’m absolutely pooped. But was so worth it! We celebrated Allison’s 3rd Birthday with good food, and great friends.
I wish I had photos of us(myself and two friends), traipsing through the market in the pouring rain looking for fresh, just ripe fruit.
Even better would be the looks on our friends faces when we told them the “dirt” was the cake. A first for them. But I was too busy in the kitchen. Here’s the shots we did manage to get. Most by Andrew.
